Reflections of the Heart

Well, I know it probably looks as if I dropped off the face of the planet...but I did not. :-) I have been doing a lot of thinking, though, and praying. Praying about what I should be doing with my life...where my focus should be...where I should be spending my energy...and on whom.

I don't believe that I am spending anywhere near enough time with my Creator. That is just plain dumb!! The One who made me...Yahweh God...is the One who knows me best...and who loves me the most! When I spend time with Him, it is a sweet time of fellowship.

There is a verse about God's word being sweeter than honeycomb...or is it honey. Shoot...I really need to look that up! I should KNOW these things. See...evidence that I am not spending enough time with Him and His word!

Anyway, the idea is that God's word is good to eat with the spirit and the heart, just like honey is good to eat with the mouth. I have found that to be so true! It is what sustains me in the hard times...and in the good ones, too; for I have found that, being a survivor, even the good times are fraught with hard things.

This is a difficult time...solstice and my father's birthday. Yet, I know that God is with me. Nothing can happen that He does not allow or cause. Either way, He will turn it for my good. He will redeem it somehow. I will be able to use it to help someone else who has gone through things...or who is going through it now. Like my being accessed by my former t, I have learned good things from it...as hard as it was to go through.

No matter what happens, I know that He loves me. Ultimately, this world will fall away and I will be with Him forever. There will be no more pain, no more sorrow, no more death and suffering. While I am still here, I want to serve Him and others as best I can. I want to be an instrument of healing to others...if I can get my own stuff out of the way. He can change me...and He is. He can make me a better servant...and daughter for Him.

I am His joy. He showed me years ago that He is joyful when He sees me. I am both the Father's joy (Abba's joy)...and a source of joy. That makes my heart glad!

I hope to be writing here more soon. Many things have kept me away, but I am trying to reprioritize my life. Why am I here? What do I want to accomplish? What is God's plan for me? I know His ultimate plan...but what is His shorter term plan...while I am still here? That is what I am seeking to know...what He wants me to do in this life here!